How to Tap Into Your Instinctive Parenting Style With Myers Briggs Personality!

Your children are people to! Parenting has a great deal to do with understanding the preceding statement.

Your personality traits have pre-programmed you to prefer behaving in certain ways that affect and explain your natural tendencies in parenting.

Once you take the Myers Briggs test and determine which of the 16 personality types you are the personality traits common to that type can guide you as you parent your child and develop good parenting skill.

In addition, your child has a personality also.

Typically your child’s personality traits can be accurately identified as early as the age range of 6 to 8 on up to age 15yrs. using the Murphy-Meisgeier which is the Myers Briggs test for children.

There is now a internet version of the Murphy-Meisgeier as of 12/2007!! Contact this web site if you are interested in making arrangements for your child to take the Murphy-Meisgeier. Or scroll down this page and submit your request here.

The regular Myers-Briggs can be used for children above the ages of 15yrs. These, of course, are the teen years and the MBTI can be invaluable in promoting positive communication between parents and their teens.

In addition to the MBTI go to this site to learn more about the unique issues teenagers face.

Parents who love their children usually want the best in life for them and in effect will raise them in the best way the parents know.

This is usually an “unconscious” attempt at “cloning” the child into a version of the parents.

All we know is how we were raised and our personality traits have programmed behavior preferences that cause us to help the child be a version of us.

The problem enters when the child’s personality type and personality traits are different than the parents.check out the ParentingMBTI swicki at eurekster.com

At that point, in essence, all the advice given in this site at other points describing actions when encountering personality differences would apply.

The fact that we are talking about your child does not change anything.

Remember, personality is comprised of instinctive preferences for certain behaviors over others your child is no exception.

Your child’s type and resultant personality traits may be different than yours and most of the time they will be different to some degree.

So we are talking about nurturing your child the way they are versus raising them exclusively by your nature….”nature vs nurture”.

In other words, try to recognize the role your personality traits will play in the life of your child who may (and probably does) have different personality traits than yours.

Understanding your role based upon personality type is good parenting skill.

In order to understand the “nature vs nurture” reality you would need a better understanding of how your personality type and the resultant personality traits are likely to impact your child in a parenting situation.

We will consolidate the 16 personality types into 4 groups or “temperaments”, and discuss personality traits for each temperament in general terms now; later, your can investigate how your specific personality type would naturally tend to parent within the broader context of the group temperament.

• The “sensing judging types or SJ”
• The “sensing perceiving types or SP”
• The “intuitive feeling types or NF”
• The “intuitive thinking types or NT”

The Sensing Judging-SJs Parenting Tendencies (ISTJ,ISFJ,ESTJ,ESFJ)

• The SJ will tend to be more strict parents driven by a need to teach right from wrong.
• The SJ children “must”do things that reflect properly upon the family.
• The SJ parent is more naturally prone to use corporal (spanking) punishment, or at least, believe that they should.
• The SJ parent will be concerned that their child becomes socialized into the conventions and norms of community.
• The SJ parent is likely to be very concerned with “providing” for the child.
• The SJ parent can become somewhat overprotective in their pursuit of teaching and providing for their children within the right and wrong perspective.
• The SJ parent is more likely to believe that children should be seen and not heard.

The Sensing Perceiving-SP Parenting Tendencies(ISTP,ISFP,ESTP,ESFP)

• The SP parent will by nature take a hands off approach to raising children.
• The SP parent is more naturally prone to permissiveness and prone also to overindulgence more than overprotection and to under-supervision more than to over-supervision as in the SJ temperament.
• The SP parent will be prone to believe that their child needs freedom and latitude in order to experiment and discover life for themselves.
• The SP parent will be more prone to allow the child to “learn the hard way”.
• The SP parent can be prone to pay less attention to the physical and safety needs of their children.
• The SP parent may be more likely to pay attention to the fun and adventure that their child can have.
• Some SP parents can at times, when is seems logical, become very strict and will have a zero tolerance for back talk of any kind.
• Many SP parents actually enjoy the play, the adventure and would rather join the child in play and get serious later.

The Intuitive Feeling-NF Parenting Tendencies(INFJ,INFP,ENFP,ENFJ)

• The NF parent will naturally seek ”harmony”above all else with their children.
• The NF parent normally needs to be intimately involved in their child’s life, in everything the child does the NF parent would like to have a part.
• The NF parent strongly seeks a good positive self-image for their child.
• The NF parent will be prone to touch, hugs, hair scratching, a pat on the back…other signs of physical affection that are appropriate….NF parents are very touchy-feely!
• The NF parent is very likely to talk with their child about dreams, visions, fantasies, fairy tales, and at an early age.
• The NF parent will also tend to express a general family harmony to the child. The child may be trained to consider the feelings and “harmony” of the entire family as well as their own.

The Intuitive Thinking-NT Parenting Tendencies(INTJ,INTP,ENTP,ENTJ)

• The NT parent above all else is a natural “pragmatist”, and child rearing will be logical and down-to-earth.
• The NT parent will be prone to naturally teach that there is a difference between a “right” and a “privilege”, with most of family life a “privilege”.
• The NT parent will not impose unreasonable rules and regulations upon children, but will remove items, activities, people if these things are abused or transgressed
• The NT parent has a natural tendency to teach self-reliance.
• The NT parent will also have the tendency to treat the child as an individual responsible for themselves and their own behavior.
• The NT parent is the least likely of the types to have a “plan” for raising the child, yet will do everything to teach self-reliance so their child can figure things out for themselves.

Good parenting skill development requires you to understand both the personality traits you possess and the personality traits your children possess.

With a good understanding of what you can expect from your type and your child's type you can better see any differences that might exist between you and your children.

Then you can re frame, modify, flex, develop, encounter and better understand and use in a positive way those natural personality trait differences between you and your child.

You must use the traits you cannot change them, they are, after all, instinctive.

If you have not taken the Myers Briggs and don’t know your personality type and the associated personality traits you can take the MBTI here!

Then link below for a more detailed view of what to expect from your child when you know their personality type. Or study each of the 16types below to help you determine the type of your child. Lastly, contact us and we will help you determine your child's type using the Murphy-Meisgeier tool. (ages 6-14)

If your child is 15yrs and above they can determine their type on this site!

ISTJ ISFJ INFJ INTJ ISTP ISFP INFP INTP ESTP ESFP ENFP ENTP ESTJ ESFJ ENFJ ENTJ

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